"...You got to make the mornin' last..."

I stayed home from work today, and it always seems like the days fly by when I want them to just SLOW DOWN. Why can't it still be 9am instead of noon? Life has been going full-steam ahead, and I've been keeping up all right, but I'm ready for a break. I finished another journal on Sunday--this one only took me 9 months to fill up. That's a record. So much has happened in the last year--SO much. And it just keeps happening. New things are popping up along with the seeds this spring, and it's been fun, but I'm wondering how it's not all spinning out of control. I hope to have a better grip on things once school is out. I hope I'll make time to exercise and clean and read and write and breathe. I hope. But I'm happy. I really am. But I'm a worrier. I really am. It's hard for me to just enjoy something. But good things are surrounding me and I'm going to try to just drink them in and tell myself that I deserve them. (But even as I type that, I don't feel like I do, but I'm going to try.) Never have I felt more of an outpouring of love from those around me, and maybe that's why I needed to go through all the muck of these last few months. Who knows? I think it may take me years to figure out why this year has been the way it has. I'm just hoping I can let go of the baggage and just keep the post cards.